Is Work Full of “The Shoulds & The Oughts”?
Career Advice: Be very wary of the “The Shoulds and The Oughts“: Why? It’s because these two words Could indicate that the thing you are considering is not your choice. It can indicate that the thing that you are considering is, in fact, the option that others might have chosen for you. These options might not be the things you Want to do.
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book a session?“Shoulds & Oughts“ are often tied in with authority. These can be beliefs about duty and the things that our parents or schools or communities wanted us to be doing. Doing what we “Should & Ought“ to do might even be victim-language. it might mean that we are avoiding taking responsibility for the choices we are choosing now.
“This might be an equation that you wish to bring to consciousness.”
It might mean that we are doing what we think others think we Should be doing. Whilst that might seem to be a complicated sentence, it might be a computation you are doing subconsciously day in and day out. This might be an equation that you wish to bring to consciousness.
Why? because when we notice a “Should“ or an “Ought” then it gives us the chance to examine our intent. It gives us a chance to see if it is a “Want”, or if it can be jettisoned.
Examine this thought: “I should stay in this job”. Ask instead “Do I want to stay in this job?”. This will generate an answer that is more true for you. There will still be “Shoulds & Oughts”, where. having examined them, you decide that they Are much the best option. “I should feed my children” will probably still stand once you have engaged in that same process. I am not advocating total irresponsibility here, I Am encouraging authenticity.
Sound Career Advice
We design our careers step by step, decision by decision. If we are consistently doing “What we Should & what we Ought” then, we might just be giving our power away to those outside of us. You might find that you being dutiful to those either in our past or in your present.
Be Curious regarding your intent: Choose to do what you want to do. I dare you!